With The Hellect ...er sorry ... the elect......

The first thing that struck me on becoming a mod was my eyes were opened to a completely new forum which was directly below a chatbox.

At first, I was terrified to venture into the hidden quarters of the Hellect. But it was the only way I could get to the training area.

Still, I stared at it for half an hour before daring venture in.

Right next to my name was the big "S" for stupid so I thought if all the other 'Stupids' could go in there, I could too.

(The "S" actually meant Staff, MY name for it was Stupid)

Very timidly I entered, only to find I was the last new mod to do so, therefore I was the last new mod to be welcomed.

The welcome was very nice. Everyone said " Fresh Meat!" and " More victims!" and gave us cyber medical supplies and many "mwuuuahahahahahahaha's" which was rather nice too. I noted the absence of cake and drinks though.

It took a long time to get through that welcome thread as others had made themselves at home straight away laughing at all the bandages and medical supplies. I wasn't so sure of myself ....... there was an atmosphere about that forum which put me on guard.

In another thread we were bade to put out piccies up for all the Hellect to see. That took me a day to decide. The only recent one I had was one which was had been taken when I had been shopping and thoroughly worn out!

In a little nook there it was, the "Prayer room for the Elect. Yes, it was named "for the elect".

I wondered about that for half an hour, did these people and the owners REALLY think all the mods there were the 'elect'?! Then started to giggle. This one was a shy little duck. I would never go near that place. I saw myself as no elect.

Then to the training thread. Oh wonder of wonders!

"This is where you use your tools blah, blah," But ... they never told us HOW to use them!

I clicked onto my 'tools' and read the list. "move thread' 'pin thread'" etc; etc;
Then moved the training thread into the trash and couldn't get it out again.

I pm'd another mod and told her and she went off her head! "You have unpinned the training thread!!!!" It was like I had murdered the thing! I had always admired her, suddenly she showed her true colours and my admiration flew out the cyber window.

The Training thread was directly above the deleted trash from the Forums and quickly fading into the distance! I was panicking. I went back to the Forum in tears to find it neatly repinned.

Soon a pm came from a mod who laughed at me and said "It happens all the time. clik on tools etc;etc;" and from that time on we became the best of friends.

I practised pinning and unpinning the practice thread for half an hour after that.

Then to the "Hidden Post" area.

All mods used hidden posts there. These were a green colour and our avatars plus the big "S" for Stupid looked good on the green. Nobody on the Forums could see these posts and they were used in Appeals and to warn other staff that a member was being watched in threads.

As for the rest of the training, we had to work that out for ourselves.

I saw the reports going into the Report Forum and decided to have a look in there.

So this was the gully trap? I had seen the waste disposal unit so this was new. So was the language. What the heck were they talking about? RFE? O/W? U/W? acrynoms flew like bad language at a booze up!

I had to ask, and chose my friend to explain. He explained everything and this was copied and pasted to notepad and kept. Like ... I happen to be a compulsive hoarder?

Then came the hard one at that time. Splitting and merging a thread. Never will that be forgotten. For me, it was absolutely impossible!!

But, it had to be learned, so I printed out the instructions as given by another mod I used to play a game with in a thread prior to becoming one of the Stupid ones, and began to practice.

After a few minutes practice I knew something was desperately wrong when I couldn't find what I was working with.

Oh yes! There is was! All in little bits in the trash with all the little bits fading into the distance. Panic set in and I was shaking with fear.

I grabbed the Header Post and repinned it ... but the rest?????!!!! Only one thing to do, pm my friend in a hurry!!

He didn't answer. Instead, I went to the Forum to find it all stuck back together the way it had been originally THEN, I received the pm from him. "Done!"

I wept with relief. Never could I have met a greater friend when in need. Then again, we went back a long way having met at Emma's in 2003.

I watched him Mod. He was superb! And it became my dearest wish to Mod with him just to learn. He played tricks with me in hidden posts, I played tricks with him in hidden posts. And he proved to be the only true friend I would really have on the Squad.

I watched as applicants for Mods came in. In surprise I watched some applicant have rather harsh things said about them by the Squad! Especially one I knew well. The wording they used was too harsh, so I interrupted and spoke the truth about the person as I knew it. She was a lovely person!

On my word, she was accepted and went into training in due time.

Soon, I dedicated myself to this new life. Training was short and before long I was assigned to a team still wondering how to split and merge a thread. That would come in time. I prayed I wouldn't have to do it.

Then, once assigned to a team, I was accepted to be able to speak to other mods on msn. Nice. It seemed they all congregated on msn!

Soon came my gentle Forums, ones which gave very little bother. And my name with the Big "S" for Stupid went to the top of the Forum in the Mod Box.

This gave me time to browse what mods talked about in the Squad Forum.

"Is this Avatar appropriate?"
" Is This Signature Appropriate?"
"What Should I Do About This?"
" Do You Think This Is Sock For ........"

And of course there were the threads where they patted one another on the back.

But the shock came when I found the threads with the Protestant Mods fighting with the Catholic Mods!

At that time I had a Home Church and didn't attend any organised religion so decided to forget it, but that didn't stop me from reading the flaming attacks on one another.

Then, one of the viscious ones on CF showed her fangs and started a thread about me in the open Forum. She was adamant I had no knowledge of the plan of Salvation and all Mods knew to whom she was referring. Me.

The thread was titled just for me and I knew I had Satan at my back.

She had reported me for telling a young man he was saved due to his belief in Jesus prior to my becoming a mod.

Other Mods had agreed with me and refused any warning and explained why to her. I had no knowledge of this report nor what was going on behind my back at that time until she had pm'd me with hate pm's.

That thread was settled by other mods of the particular Forum. Oh she was a cunning woman. Cunning and spitefilled, I watched the deleted thread fade into the distance in the trash.

Then my stalker started a thread. I had told her to cease stalking me so she started a thread about should people who hurt people be mods.

And I knew I had Satan plus many, many demons on my tracks!

I watched as that thread faded into the distance in the trash and knew instantly, I had two deadly enemies who would stop at nothing to harm and belittle me.

Then, a thread was started in the Mod Forum. "Should People who don't attend church be mods?"

I was shocked, no,no, I think paralysed was the word. In the thread was a hearse like the one which took my husbands body away. Written across it boldly was "Don't Wait For A Hearse To Take You To Church!". They had used my dead husband as an example!! WHOA!!!!

They all agreed only people who attended church should be Mods. I had never seen anything so cruel and heartless in my life! These people were christians???! To hell with them! I KNEW there was an atmosphere I did not like about that Forum.

I lost my temper and told them just what I thought of the Hellect. That I knew they were referring to me and that I was above such childish nonsense. I also asked them if they felt BETTER because they attended church? Did Jesus look on them any differently because they attended a man made structure? Did Jesus tell us to go to Church in the NT??! Then I told them to "Go to hell where you belong".

It was then I placed in my resignation. It was refused point blunt. I turned my head away from any forced apology and demanded release from the Hellect


It was refused on the grounds that I was needed.



Yes, I was needed. I was being trained to mod the hardest Forums on the site. The Hellect had plans for me as they had followed my posts with precision. What they saw in them, I will never know!

I was furious when my resignation was denied and lashed out by reporting everyone who committed a breach. By this time I knew the then rules backwards and if they refused to release me, and use my dead husband in that manner, I would make then work.

Then, I shut the computer off and went away to cry like a baby. I loathed them!
And suddenly, I wanted to hurl the computer through the window and never look at it again.

To use the death of my husband in order to belittle me was beyond my comprehension! They knew he had not been a church goer.

And of course a woman had started the despicable thread.

I was inconsolable and the sobbing would not cease. I had also just lost my Father and Mother, both non church goers.

Grief and anger overwhelmed me until I sobbed myself out, alone, beneath a tall gumtree and fell fast asleep.

I don't know how long I slept, all I knew was that I NEVER wanted to go back there to
be faced with that most viscious thread again.

The computer stayed off. To ensure it stayed off, I took it to it's repair man to have it checked and out of my sight and told he and his wife what had happened.

Their shock was similar to mine. They refuse to go near any church and always have.

The advice from friends came for me to refuse to answer reports and refuse to log in there. Advice quickly grabbed!

But, I had to tell the Hellect my intentions. I never knew what they were actually thinking - nor why they were so secretive about some things.......... all I knew was that I had grown to loathe them with a deep loathing. They grieved my spirit.


I logged into the place and the report button was flashing. I deleted every report.

They would release me one way or the other because as sure as hell, I did not want to carry the big "S" for Stupid anymore.